Out with the (somewhat) old (blog), in with the new!

Ok, as hard as I worked on coming up with a term to explain my passion and heart for being used to serve others with my prostate cancer survival, I've decided to retire the "openvessel" name. I still like it, but it never really grabbed me, especially since I had a time trying to explain it. If you have a hard time trying to explain or describe a concept then it's too abstract. What really stands out the most for me is my slogan "broken to serve." So, that will be the name of the new blog that I'm constructing, especially since I've already purchased the domain name for it (see the link to the right). With "openvessel," I was trying to say it with one term. Something simple but with a big meaning. That's the designer in me. But sometimes I find that short phrases can do the same thing. "Broken to serve" just has that ring - enough so that it is not only my slogan but also the main concept. Same scripture reference though. That one says it all. I will keep this blog up for at least 6 months to a year after I launch the new one. Stay tuned. See new logo above. Hmmm. That means I've gotta get another t-shirt made... And new cards... Oh, well.

Another free screening and PSA update

My church had another one of its monthly men's fellowships with another annual prostate health screening on November 1. As I was walking in my pastor wanted me to come sit by him and share a few words with the brothers about my survival and to encourage them, which is what I always look forward to. My own PSA checks are now at 6-month periods. I'm not due for another check until February 09 but why not do it since they're here for free? My results came back about 2-3 weeks later and I'm still undetectable!!!! Praise the Lord!!!! The number was <0.04 which was the normal PSA lab test that the hospital does in their own lab. I normally get the "ultra-sensitive" test done that goes out to the thousandths place. But, good report anyway! Now I need to work on my cholesterol. My bad cholesterol was good, but my good cholesterol showed a little low. Need to work on that.


After the screening I had the chance to talk with another brother who tested positive as a result of the same free screening. He was not from my fellowship, but was screened by the same hospital. I was called by the prostate screening program coordinator (again) and given the information. As others, the brother had a few questions about surgery options and post-surgery concerns. It does my heart good to inform and encourage other men with my experience. Please feel free to email me any questions or concerns that you may have about prostate cancer. I don't know everything, but I know enough and will find out more for anyone if I need to.


I would strongly encourage men who belong to churches or any other local organizations to rally together and have some health fairs and screenings. Get with your local hospitals and see if they offer free prostate screening programs. Many lives can be saved with early detection of this disease. What's that old saying? "What you don't know can't hurt you." What a lie! Many think that if they don't know then it can't affect them. Most of us men are just dumb like that (me included). I can just imagine how many men, especially African American men, who are just walking around day by day with prostate cancer in their bodies and just don't know it because there are no symptoms at first. There's another old saying that's a better one: "Ignorance of the law is no excuse." Just because you don't know about it doesn't make it go away or not exist. Brothers, GET SCREENED NOW before it becomes too late!!! Prostate cancer doesn't wait for you to find out about it before it starts to grow. Give that some thought.

E. D.

Ok, I've put this one off long enough. This is the one area (along with incontinence) that guys don't even want to think about, let alone experience. These are also the reasons (E. D. and incontinence) most guys put off treatment after they have been diagnosed. Putting it off is not the answer. Would you rather be incontinent with E. D. and cured – or dead??? Sorry for being so blunt, but this is a reality among men and their fear of treatment. However, it's a reality for prostate cancer post-surgery. When the prostate is removed, there are nerves which contribute to the erectile function that have to be severed. You can speak with your surgeon and request that he do "nerve sparing" during the procedure. But, this is something that is still unavoidable. Yet, thanks to modern medicine, it is treatable! As many of you know there are a few well-known prescriptions out there that assist in "overcoming" E. D. when necessary. Each man should consult with his urologist to find out what works best for him. There are even a few other solutions beyond the pills that are available. So, for all my married brothers who have to be treated for prostate cancer – it ain't over! There is hope and there is help. Talk to your urologist or if you'd like shoot me an email and I can explain further. I'll save the details for the one-on-one conversations. I'm not endorsing any one particular medication, but I can help with what I know. Again, brothers, it ain't over!!!

6 months later and another PSA!

Hey, folks! It's been 6 months since my last PSA test. I had another one on August 27 and I just received the results in the mail. Survey says: 0.013! Yahoo! Praise the LORD again for even more grace and mercy!!! I truly don't deserve it!


Like always, this is the "ultrasensitive" PSA performed by the Siemens Immulite Chemiluminescent Assay (as used by Methodist Hospital - Dallas). The who??? I'm not for certain what kind of contraption that is. I don't have all of the information on it just yet. When I gather the proper info I'll provide a link in another post. But, as a reminder, the ultrasensitive test produces a number that reads in the thousandths, where as the normal PSA test reads in the hundredths. For the normal PSA, if you have had your prostate removed the result should read < or = 0.05. The ultrasensitive test provides a more "accurate" reading.


I'm humbled and highly thankful to my Lord for another good report!!!

Blue-spangled banner! (and another challenge)

Since mid-March, I've been invited to have a table at a couple of healthfairs. I thought I'd kick it up a notch and get a banner made rather than just have the t-shirt and materials on the table. I designed it and uploaded the file to a local vendor that specializes in large-format printing and they had it ready for me in 2 days. The total size is 2' wide by 5' tall. I'll be ready for the next few healthfairs if I'm ever invited.


I had some great opportunities to speak with a few guys about getting themselves checked on a regular basis while telling them about my experience. Many were shocked when I told them my age. The funniest thing is to see some guys look down at my table as they walk by and keep going because THEY DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT! They're afraid to discuss it because they make a big issue about the "finger" check, but don't realize that the digital rectal exam is a very minor part of the check up. Getting the finger up your rear is the least of your worries compared to having prostate cancer and not even knowing it when you have no symptoms! What's the old saying? What you don't know can't hurt you. What a big lie!!! What you don't know can and will kill you if you do nothing about it!!! Man up and go to the doctor, brothers!!! Take the finger and get your blood checked for the PSA! Remember, there are no symptoms with early detection. If you have symptoms or if the urologist feels a hardness on your prostate, then it's possibly advanced. Why wait?????

Been there, done that, got the t-shirt!

That's right, folks! Just to show how serious I am about my testimony and spreading the knowledge about prostate cancer survival, I had my own t-shirt made. My good friend and Christian brother Gerald, who has his own screen printing business, made 2 shirts for me - and blessed me by not charging a dime!!! I purchased the shirt and provided the art. He provided the other shirt, which is a light blue ringer T (dark blue trim on neck and sleeve), and it has dark blue print - same art. (Thanks to my beautiful wife for taking the pics!)

Part Seventeen: PSA update!

Last Thursday (2.28.08) I went to see my urologist for the first 6-month visit (after doing it every 2 - 3 months) for another PSA blood check. My beautiful, loving, anxious wife called this week (just 3 days later) to get the results. My current PSA reading is 0.017 - still undetectable!!!!!! Praise the LORD for His grace!!!!! Now, it's just a little higher than the last one 6 months ago, which was 0.011 and 3 months before that it was 0.012. But, still undetectable since it's equal to or less than 0.05! My next PSA check is in August and I will post the results then!

Part Sixteen: Prostate Cancer Advocates Conference

Early in February, I flew to Atlanta to attend an African American Men's Prostate Cancer Advocates Conference (whew! what a mouthful!). It was held on the campus of Clark Atlanta University, which is in the same area of Morehouse, Morris Brown, and Spelman - a pretty historic location! The goal of this conference was to raise awareness about the growing number of African American men who get diagnosed with prostate cancer more than any other race. There were approximately 30-40 attendees - most of which were survivors/advocates. There were also individuals who are involved in cancer research, oncology, and pharmaceuticals. For the goal of raising awareness, we decided to come up with a name, logo, and marketing campaign to spread the word about prostate cancer and encourage more research and greater national/global awareness. As some said, there is so much awareness about breast cancer and AIDS/HIV - and rightly so. There's just not enough research and awareness about prostate cancer, especially in finding out why so many African American men get it more than others. Since I'm a graphic designer and work in the field of communications, I let them know that the names that they were coming up with were way too long and just not punchy. I assured the guys and gals that I would come up with a name and logo/identity that would help get some attention. Actually, I had a name already that came to me in one of the earlier sessions. Little did I know that they would want to actually pursue a brand for this. I truly believe that what came to me was a gift inspired from the Lord. Now I just need to finish my report and designs to market it to the group and pray that they love it. I will post my finished concept and their responses when the time comes. (Click image above to view larger version. Special thanks to our bus driver for taking the pic for me!)

Part Fifteen: Don't Put It Off!!!

There's a phrase going around about prostate cancer diagnosis which is "watchful waiting." In other words, don't really do anything about it for now. Just wait and keep checking on it to see if it gets worse. That's a bad move - to not move at all!!! Remember, prostate cancer is slow-growing in its early stages as long as it is contained within the prostate. But, it is growing.


In October 2007, the first week, I had the gracious opportunity to give my testimony at church twice - first during our Wednesday night Bible study and then Saturday during a monthly Men's fellowship. At the Men's fellowship (which is every first Saturday) we also had our annual free men's prostate screening following the service - which is how I was diagnosed in 2006!!! I found out later that a few brothers had high PSA numbers. One of them introduced himself to me at another men's Bible study group that I attend on Monday nights. He told me that he was tested the year before and had a high PSA result but didn't do anything about it. I told him, "That's not good." He went on to say that he was still waiting on the results from the '07 screening and that he really enjoyed my testimony. About a week later he grabbed me and said, "I got my results back. I'm in trouble." I told him, "No you're not. Let's talk." I shared with him more information and directed him to read my blog for more details and doctor info. The last time I spoke with him he told me that he had his biopsy done and the results were positive. His next step was to speak with the doctor about surgical options and he was very interested in the robotic procedure.


The brother could be in far worse shape, but the point is this: DON'T PUT IT OFF, BROTHERS!!!!! Get yourself tested! Early detection is a blessing! Being tested positive is only a negative if you wait too long!!! Make that doctor's appointment and MAN-UP to take the finger (digital exam) and the needle (PSA)!!! PEACE!!!

Part Fourteen: The Right Perspective, pt. 2

In a previous post (Part Five) I talked about having the "right perspective" when trials and tests come to basically invade our comfort zones. I addressed the question "Why Me?" and how the better, more divine focus should make us ask "Why NOT Me?"


To really hone in on the exact purpose for trials, tests, and even temptations, it's good to look at Paul's assessment as he and other followers of CHRIST were persecuted and made to suffer for what they believed in even though they did nothing wrong. We think our trials are bad - try constantly being sentenced to death and always being sought after to be executed for what you believe to be the truth! With all that in mind, Paul told the disciples in Corinth, Greece in his second letter to them that "... we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself."(1:8) But then, he hits the nail on the head and explains the reason for going through it all: "Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on GOD Who raises the dead!"(v.9) That's the right perspective!!! In fact, that's reality - whether I perceive it or not!


So, for the follower of CHRIST - is your trial or test an attack from the enemy or negative circumstances, or are you being "pruned" to bear fruit or rather "broken to serve" in order to rely totally on the One Who saved you in order to use you? For we are His workmanship, created in CHRIST JESUS for good works, which GOD prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. - Ephesians 2:10


For the non-Christian - is your trial or negative experience a result of bad luck or bad karma, or is this the time and opportunity given to you to realize that life is not about you? There is someone who is absolute and far greater than your experiences who can not only solve your problems, but is Himself the solution to everything! His peace is that which passes understanding - incomprehensible by human knowledge because it is a peace that lives in the hearts of men even when circumstances haven't changed. I know what you're asking: "Why does God have to afflict me or anyone else to get my attention to surrender to His will? Why can't he just tell me?" Maybe He has. How many times have you heard the Gospel?


JESUS is LORD, and I am not!!! He is the Shepherd - I am but a sheep, lost without His authority, wisdom, guidance, truth, and peace! Robotic prostatectomy didn't save me. Early detection didn't spare me. It is the Sovereignty and Providence of The Almighty Lord JESUS Who strategically orchestrated it all so that I would have the perfect wife to encourage me to be medically responsible and get myself checked and then to get checked when I did before it got any worse!!! That's divine providence! That's grace and mercy!!! There is no luck! For from Him and through HIM and to HIM are all things. To HIM be glory forever. Amen! - Romans 11:36

Part Thirteen: PSA - post surgery

It's about 4 weeks out from surgery around the end of January and time to get my blood checked at UT. Now, the goal is to have almost nothing show up since the surgery removed the entire prostate, and with it, the cancer. To be more specific, the PSA number should read "equal to or less than" 0.05. One week later the results came back at 0.09, which is above the expected result. The doctor (Roerhborn) assured me that this is normal since I'm only about a month out of surgery and it takes time for the blood stream to be cleared of the protein which gives off the reading of the PSA number. He tells me to check back in another 4 weeks or so to see if it's lower, same, or higher. A rapid increase in the number indicates that cancer has spread to other parts of the body and further treatment is necessary.


Speaking of further treatment, my wife and I thought that it would be wise to do research to see if this was necessary. She spoke with an oncologist, who we met through a church member, to get advice on this. She was told that it would be wise and was referred to another one at a different hospital. We made the appointment and drove there when the day came. The oncologist received the data on me a made his assessment. Now, I have to explain something: One of the things that the data revealed is that I have what's called "positive margins" meaning that there is prostatic tissue that remains inside me where the prostate was which may (or may not) contain cancer cells. These cancer cells can become dormant and die off or grow. Knowing this, the doctor recommended that I should immediately start radiation and hormone treatment. Now, understand this - whatever state I was in at this time regarding continence or anything else in that area would be locked in with no chance of physical improvement, healing of nerves, etc. Plus, hormone treatment would cause such side effects like hot flashes, tenderness in the breasts (yeah, you read right), and etc. again. Think of it as early menopause for men (yikes)! We left and thought about it for a few days. Dr. Roerhborn received the oncologist's recommendation for me in his office and was "furious!!!" He told us later that he immediately sent him an email asking him why in the world would he recommend treatment with only 1 PSA reading right after surgery!!!??? By the way, he told us this when I went back a few weeks later after my second PSA result which was "less than or equal to" 0.05 which is undetectable!!! Praise the LORD!!!!!


We then found out that the first hospital (Methodist), where I had the biopsy, gets PSA results out to the thousandths, called "ultra sensitive," whereas the normal PSA readings are out to the hundredths. We went back there and requested their reading. One week later the results came back and it read 0.008!!! We gave this reading to Dr. Roerhborn and he was floored at the number and exclaimed, "That's pretty d@#m low." We laughed as he followed that with a modest, "Excuse me." He then went on to vent about why in the world would the oncologist recommend that I get treatment (with its side effects) after only 1 PSA reading when I may not even need to go through all of that!


I kept going back to both UT and Methodist for PSA readings every 2-3 months as was needed. The UT readings remained the same! At Methodist, the "ultra sensitive" reading jumped up just a little with 0.012. However this is still below the normal reading and remains in the "undetectable" range!!! Dr. Roehrborn stated that with the ultra sensitive readings you'll get a few "ticks" of variation in the reading, especially in the thousandths place, so there's no need for alarm. Next reading, around late July 07, my reading was 0.011. The urologist at Methodist told me, "You're doing good. I'll see you again in 6 months!" So, spreading out my visits for the PSA blood test is a good sign!

Part Twelve: Recovery, pt. 2

Well, it's December 29, 2006, again, and I'm at home recuperating. The first week goes really well. I make sure that I have that big 40-ounce hospital cup sitting on my nightstand filled with water. I go through about 4-5 of those a day. It's impotant to do this so that the surgical area (mainly the bladder) is constantly being cleaned out. Not to be gross, but there is blood in urine and this is common. That's why is important to drink lots and lots of water to clean the bladder out and avoid blod clots and other impurities. My sweet wife was constantly emptying my catheter bag and bringing me more water and cooking me the best, healthy meals which she brought to me in bed. My sweet, sweet mom came by later a few times to check on me and help out, as well. Even my kids would come in and bring food and other things I needed. They would spend time with me and watch movies. Through all of this they remained calm as I rested and healed - and my youngest is about to turn 4!


On Friday, January 5, 2007, it's time to take a trip back to the hospital (UT Southwestern) to have the catheter removed. Thank GOD!!!!! The doctor told me that while I have the catheter in I would have a constant feeling of having to go to the bathroom. And I did! It was uncomfortable, but not painful. The nurse told me to lie back on the table as she did what one of the doctors did after my surgery - take a huge syringe and inject saline solution through the tube which went into my bladder (that weird feeling again!). Then she tells me to take a deep breath as she prepares to pull the tube out. She asked me, "Are you ready? Then take a deep breath..." Just as I begin to inhale she quickly pulls the tube out (weird feeling yet again) and tells me to hold the fluid and stand up. It is now time for me to "pee" in a square plastic container to test my continence. This is why the Kegal excersices are so important before surgery. As she had her back turned she said, "Ok, start peeing...now stop..." I did this about 3 times before emptying my bladder and demonstrated that my "muscles" are in tip-top shape! Now, I have to mention that I did wear the "man pads" for a while - just in case. I did experience from time to time what one of my doctors described as "stress incontinence." This is where you may have small leakage after getting up from a chair too fast or laughing too hard. This was quite minimal though. I was concerned as to how long I would need to wear the pads and if they would show through my dress slacks and jeans. Well they're pretty well hidden and kind of comfortable for a while. I wore them for about 5-6 weeks and decided one day to go cold-turkey and told myself that I would stop wearing them and see how I would do. I have to say that I did good and I'm very thankful that I was able to stop wearing them.


I returned home to continue to heal for the next 4 weeks. As I mentioned before, I'm very blessed and thankful to have a supportive job which allowed me to heal in the time needed and even work from home when necessary on a laptop. Speaking of time, another blessing is that since I haven't used a lot of sick time, I had about 25-27 days of sick time that I had earned and never had to use any vacation or personal time!!! I've learned that it's very important to give thanks for "everything," whether small or great! As I returned to work, I was able to take my time and come back slowly and work part time until I was comfortable enough and ready to come back in full. At this time, it's still important for me to get plenty of rest because there's lots of time needed to heal. The beauty and blessing in all of this is that I'm not only able to rest my body to heal but also my mind. Having a great, loving wife and a great job from the Lord allowed me to not have to worry about anything which supercharged the healing process and I'm very, very, very thankful for that!!!